Friday, February 24, 2006

You know what we need?

A radical feminist mascot! It will help with morale significantly, I swear. After a very late night IM chat with Andrea from Vociferate I am proposing the wolverine.

Isn't she cute? Wolverines are perfect for radical feminists, let me tell you why:

"The wolverine is noted for its strength, cunning, fearlessness, and voracity. No animal except humans hunts the wolverine. (sound familiar?) Solitary during most of the year, the wolverine has a short courtship in February or March." They love their space! These little firecrackers are only 18-40 lbs (8-18 kilos, although kilos are not a weight force unlike pounds, but that's the physicist in me. If I gave you weight in Newtons no one would know what I was talking about), and only 36-46 cm (14-18 inches) tall!
  • The wolverine has been described as "the fiercest creature on earth" and "a dangerous, fearless fighter"
  • People have reported seeing a wolverine carry away moose carcasses (at least 700 lbs) and caribou heads. They've also been known to destroy steel traps and eat through wood walls.
  • They can fight a bear off their dinner
  • Wolverines have 38 teeth and crushing jaws capable of searing through frozen flesh and bones
  • They do steal big prey from wolves or other large carnivores, but are perfectly capable of downing a caribou or moose all on their own.

First Nations peoples praised wolverines for:
  • Standing your ground
  • Fierceness
  • Elusiveness
  • Cleverness
  • Strength
  • Endurance
  • Courage
They're tiny little misunderstood powerhouses! Sounds familiar to me anyway. What do you think? I am in love with the wolverine.


ms. jared said...

perfect! i am in love with her.

strong, fearless and true.

best. mascot. ever.
xoxo, jared

lost clown said...

Glad you like them. *big grin* I am in love as well. I think they're perfect. Too bad it's vulnerable in CA and endangered in the US.

Violet said...

Cool! Do you know that wolverines are very popular mascots in U.S. high school sports? It seems like every town of any size has one school whose team is "The Wolverines." And the girls' team is, of course, "The Lady Wolverines." I typed that through clenched teeth, I'll have you know.

lost clown said...

Our cheer at Water Polo tournaments is Lady Viks. I'm usually anti-social and swim away before that point. I also type that through clenched teeth. Who said that Vikings were all male. grrrrrrrrrr

Well, our Wolverine mascot can kick their wolverine mascot's asses, b/c ours is the real, beautiful, wonderful animal who shares traits with us radical feminists, not just cuz someone picked it randomly one day because they sounded fierce. We ARE fierce, just like the real wolverines.

Andrea said...

Not just a mascot, oh no! A Wolverine Sidekick!

Someone says: 'You feminazi bitch!'
You say: 'Allow me to introduce you to Flurry, my Wolverine Sidekick.'

Cue lots of biting.

Kim said...

I can work with a wolverine mascot VERY well :)

Biting Beaver said...

I vote for Beaver *grin* of course I'm not biased!! LOL

No, actually the Wolverine is a wicked little critter. Hell, I know I don't want to tangle with one!

lost clown said...

I like soemthing more fercious, but I understand your affinity to beavers. ;)

Laura said...

Sounds good to me! I'd put a photo of one on my blog if only I knew how! Damn technology.

lost clown said...

I would too. *sigh* One day.

I thought it would be nice to have one on the top of my page like the Den's beaver. Grrrrrr.....wolverine will rip you apart patriarchy!

Andrea said...

Goddamit, that was supposed to say 'Fluffy' up there!

lost clown said...

I can see a flurry of biting happening though, ;)

alyx said...

I know it's de rigeur to suggest this particular animal given its status as a feminist icon has become clich├ęd, but...

What about the Female Bonobo?

They have sex with other she-monks, have sorority-style living arrangements within their communities, and bonobo gals will often rush to the defence of a sista when some nasty dude monk tries to take a whack at her.

Interestingly, bonobos are also our closest animal relatives.

On a semi-related note, I have a pet ferret named Chakotay who'd make a fantastic feminist totem. She'll bite the fingers off any boy-child stupid enough to poke their snot-excavators in her cage, but she's surprisingly docile when the poker is female. I kid you not.

lost clown said...

I still prefer the wolverines, but I'm not averse to people having their own animals, I have an affinity for these loverly creatures, and the bonobos are definitely good to show the other way our society can go (instead of the warring route of the chimpanzees).

But right now I'll go for a fighter.

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