Sunday, July 13, 2008

People who shouldn't be allowed to work with women

I don't normally look at PostSecret, but someone pointed this out to me:

There are really no words I have to describe how horrifying and repugnant this is. No matter how much you dislike someone there is NO reason to not only condone, but agree with the daily terror that is Domestic Violence. I've worked at a DV shelter and I have seen firsthand the effects of DV on women and families. There is nothing, NOTHING that excuses this. It is not only blaming the victim for the abuse whose responsibility is solely that of the abuser, but it is also continuing the oppression by blaming that person. This is the same mentality that keeps women from reporting the abuse and that keeps abusers from jail and from police taking the matter seriously.
The most common reasons for not reporting domestic violence to police are that victims view the incident as a personal or private matter, they fear retaliation from their abuser, and they do not believe that police will do anything about the incident.


Women who are in DV situations have more then enough problems without the people who are supposed to help them blaming them for abuse and disregarding the fundamental reason for that abuse: misogyny. Most women already believe that it's somehow *their fault.* The person who wrote this should quit since they feel this way.

I wish I could express myself better, I am beyond angry.

Onto more people who shouldn't be allowed around women.


Recently blogger Kyle Payne plead guilty to filming himself sexually assaulting a woman. According to his site, this is Kyle Payne:
Meet the Blogger

Kyle is a social justice educator, writer, and activist. Much of his work is concerned with putting a stop to violence against women. For years Kyle has served as an advocate for survivors of sexual violence and other forms of abuse, in addition to promoting what he calls “a more just and life-affirming culture of sexuality” through activism and education. As a researcher, Kyle has studied the feminist anti-pornography movement and is particularly interested in men’s roles in confronting pornography and the rape culture. In addition to his pro-feminist work, he is involved with anti-racist, free speech, peace, and anti-globalization movements.

Education

2008 - M.S. Degree in Adult Education
Capella University, Minneapolis, MN

2007 - B.A. Degree in Philosophy & Religion,
Social Consciousness, and Women’s Studies
Buena Vista University, Storm Lake, IA

College Activities

Rape Crisis Advocate (4 years)
Editorialist (4 years)
Webmaster (4 years, several organizations)
Resident Advisor (3 years)
Student Radio (3 years, several positions)
Academic Assistant (2 years)
VP of Service Learning (1 year)
Wellness Education Specialist (1 year)
Career Peer (1 year)
Student Senator (1 year)

College Honors and Awards

Male Leader of the Year Award, BVU (2007)
William H. Cumberland Research Award, BVU (2006)
Willard Stief Award for Community Living, BVU (2006)
Nominee, Senior of the Year, BVU (2007)
Nominee, Volunteer of the Year, BVU (2006, 2007)
Alpha Chi Honor Society (2006-present)
Dean’s Fellowship, BVU (2003-2007)
Who’s Who in American Colleges and Universities (2006)
Campus Compact Civic Engagement Fellowship (2006)


Here's the thing: Much of his work is concerned with putting a stop to violence against women. For years Kyle has served as an advocate for survivors of sexual violence and other forms of abuse, in addition to promoting what he calls “a more just and life-affirming culture of sexuality” through activism and education. As a researcher, Kyle has studied the feminist anti-pornography movement and is particularly interested in men’s roles in confronting pornography and the rape culture.

He works putting a stop to violence against women and against rape culture yet he, himself had no problem with sexually assaulting and making pornography out of an intoxicated and unconscious female student. He was in a position of power over this woman, a Resident Advisor in the dorms and police found the film on his hard drive. After he posted bail he wrote this on his blog:
"For a variety of reasons, there is very little I can say about the recent news. So, unfortunately, I cannot give you the answers that you might seek. Worse yet, I can do little in the way of defending myself against a whole host of claims about my character that are both irrational and damaging.

IRRATIONAL! IRRATIONAL! Yes it's irrational to get angry about the fact that you, someone who labeled himself a "radical feminist" who worked against rape culture then turned around and not only sexually assaulted someone, but made pornography out of it. According to his blog he works doing rape crisis advocacy which scares the hell out of me-a rapist talking to victims of sexual assault! There's more about this at Buried Alive.

7 comments:

Thomas Jackson said...

We would like to invite readers of all Domestic Violence Blogs to join us in our over 20 part series on a quest to the get U.S. Coast Guard to assist and protect a Coast Guard family from violence.

Renegade Evolution said...

LC: Thanks for blogging about this.

Lara said...

I've left the fucker a nice little comment at his blog.
He should suffer tremendously. Too bad there are TONS of other guys out there like him violating our trust and abusing and raping us. If we did away with all of the men who have ever abused and/or sexually assaulted a woman or girl probably 3/4 of the male population would be wiped out.

hexyhex said...

That made me so angry.

This just in, anonymous jerkface! EVERYONE deserves freedom from violence, not just people you find agreeable.

belledame222 said...

That Post Secret card is horrifying. I hope to hell it's just someone venting her darkest thoughts as an outlet, but at minimum, it sounds like she's been there too long and needs to go do something else.

Vile Kyle's blog is -still- up, I see. no updates, though. I want to punch that smug face every time I see it.

ms. jared said...

good lord. that is so fucked up.

i volunteered at a DV shelter for a few years and there were women there that i didn't necessarily like, but i would NEVER think that ANY of them deserved the violence that happened to them. whoever sent that card is a sick fuck and should find a new line of work that doesn't involve people. or animals for that matter. gah!

sadly, i'm not surprised by the kyle payne thing though. i'm more surprised by men who AREN'T porn sick.

lost clown said...

Yeah the Kyle Payne didn't really surprise me either. I'm in the same boat you are. My math geek and my friend I talked about in my post A New Leaf are wonderful surprises.

I hear ya. I've downright loathed some people I've worked with but never have I EVER thought that they should have suffered the domestic violence that landed them in the shelter. I mean we never get along with everyone and hating certain people's behaviours or the people themselves is not unusual, but to think something like that! I would never wish that upon any woman even those I hate.

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