Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Vibrators, not just for one

Having once worked at Toys in Babeland in NYC I know that there are plenty of bibrators out there for, shall we say, mutual pleasure. But how do people feel about a vibrator that's to be worn all day and controlled by one's boyfriend? I think that the marketing towards men says it all:

You command her arousal from afar

Imagine The Toy...

Monday morning — she leaves with The Toy inside...

She’s given you the power — You alone control The Toy

Teasing her with single word messages

Frustrating her with smouldering long fantasies

No matter how many text messages she gets today,

Yours are the ones she really, really WANTS!

Imagine the thrill of sending a sexy fantasy knowing she’s in a meeting

Setting the scene for tonight throughout the day

Foreplay for later...

Imagine the desire in her eyes when you meet again

Imagine the power, the control

Imagine her fire and the devastating passion...

Roll on Monday morning!


Yep sounds like fun. Or maybe not. How many people do you know who want to wear this contraption inside them and be 'teased' at a meeting? I like my vibrators, and not that I would everr wear one, but I can see this as being not only annoying, but uncomfortable and decidedly unsexy. Who wants to have no control over where and when they mastrubate?

I am convinced that The Toy was spawned by a posse of male scientists who were pissed that their girlfriends owned vibrators and would not let them join in on their private time. I can just see some Professor Frink-like dweeb, festering in a dank laboratory, strumming his fingers together and muttering, “With technology as my weapon, I shall control both my girlfriend and her vibrator...MWAH-HA-HA! HA-HA! HA! Glaven.*

But of course women are up for remote conterolled fun at any time because we don't have any jobs that matter, we're all fembots who are ready for sex 24/7, right? This is so mnaddening, I really have no idea what to say except GAH!

Anyone feel the feminist conspiracy yet? No. Well I guess someone hasn't been reading the papers.**



*I love Professor Frink
**Dedicated to people coming from fredx's blog.

10 comments:

Terry said...

This is just creepy. "Imagine the power, the control" says it all. It's not about what she wants at all.

Laura said...

Yuck.

Sorry bout the fredx thing, that may be my fault. My msn is fooked at the mo, grrrr, but big love to you :)

kyle said...

it is creepy and as a guy, I would feel creepy controling it. Plus, vibrators make noise....that alone might arose suspicion.

Also, the basic underlying premise here is that the woman is horny all day long, which further sexualizes and, therefore, objectifies. Weird weird weird.

lost clown said...

exactly

Nella said...

It also assumes that *nothing* a woman might be doing is particularly important. I can think of so many tasks at home and at work that would be totally interfered with by sudden, unexpected vibrations. Even if she was just making her lunch and using a knife to cut bread - really not safe to start buzzing!
On the arousing suspicion front, i guess people might just think it was her mobile phone. (yeuch, next time i hear someone's phone vibrating in class i'll have this picture in my head. Ew.)

Faith said...

"But of course women are up for remote conterolled fun at any time because we don't have any jobs that matter, we're all fembots who are ready for sex 24/7, right? This is so mnaddening, I really have no idea what to say except GAH!"

I also commented on this at Witchy's. I won't argue the control factor. But there is actually no danger of the thing going off during a meeting or anything, it only starts to vibrate when the women herself actually opens and reads the text. The man can not zap at will.

Cruella said...

Yeah maybe he could download a pre-programmed schedule of vibrations off the web pre-programmed by IT_sec "experts". If I wanted to go to bed with R2D2 I'd be queuing up outside the entry gates to "Robot Wars" studios now.

lost clown said...

muahahahahahahahahahAHA

nightgigjo said...

She’s given you the power — You alone control The Toy

Exactly what the Patriarchy wants -- women to give up the most personal+individual expression of sexual independence -- to a man.

Setting the scene for tonight throughout the day

Because, you know, if you control her masterbation, then you *know* you'll get sex when you get home.

Imagine her fire and the devastating passion...

She won't have any choice! And she'll love it!

i.e. without this toy, you're married to a frigid (in contrast to "fire")... aww hell. Just making fun of this disgusts me.

Thanks for the awareness. ^^

Vibrator Fun said...

My vibrator puts a smile on my face, but I'm in control. My rabbit vibe and I are very intimate friends.

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