Sunday, April 30, 2006

What happened to Kat?

Of The Geeky Feminist? It says her blog was deleted and that makes me sad.

Saturday, April 29, 2006

Ah the white liberal males are at it again

So for the 3 of you who read my blog and don't read I Blame the Patriarchy there has been much discussed about liberal male "feminist" bloggers/commenters lately. The esteemed Ron Sullivan sums it up beautifully:

One thing an old broad like me has seen many many many times already is some huffulacious oh-so-sincere dude walking in to a group of women almost at random and telling them

a/ what they should be doing in their free time;
b/ how to do it right;
c/ how to be feminists;
d/ why he has their best interests at heart, really;
e/ why he’s qualified to give them orders;
f/ that they’re intolerant, which is self-evidently a Bad Thing;
g/ that they’re preaching to the choir (and the biggest surprise is that they’re preaching);
h/ that some of his best fucks are women;
i/ how to be better feminists;
j/ that they’re not serious enough;
k/ that his wife thinks he’s the greatest;
l/ what God thinks;
m/ why whatever he’s doing this month is more important then feminism;
n/ that feminism is boo-zhwah, and that’s self-evidently a Bad Thing;
o/ that they’re shrill — wow, I almost forgot shrill;
p/ that they can’t pee standing up;
q/ that they should be ashamed of themselves;
r/ that they just don’t welcome open and vigorous debate;
s/ that he needs a beer (this is followed by an expectant silence);
t/ that they’re taking everything he said wrong;
u/ that they’re unreasonable;
v/ that they’re ~touchy~;
w/ that they’ve never said anything about oppression of women in (choose sauce: Iraq, Afghanistan, China, sub-Saharan Africa, the southeastern USA, the ghet-to, Brazil, Antarctica)
x/ that they should apologize to him because his parents had him circumcised;
y/ that he Is Too A Feminist (which evidently means something);
z/ how they should transcend feminism and embrace humanism.

Pick any two menu items and get the third half-price; pick any three and get the fourth free. With five you get a can of wine. And if you’re the guy in question, you get a free hot cup of Shut the Fuck Up.

Now you see why I couldn't resist reposting it here, if only for 3 people. But really, haven't we seen this experience everywhere: from purported rad fem allies to self proclaimed male feminists* who then proceed to enlighten us and want to be crowned Lord and Master of ALL Feminists because really they hold ALL the keys into feminism and us lowly women would be lost without them. Thank god we have these men to tell us what feminism is and who's a feminist and who's not.

(It seems that Biting Beaver has been getting some of these assholes too. Thank god ye holders of the almighty penis can enlighten us stupid uterus holders!

*male feminists ARE unicorns

Friday, April 28, 2006

My week in review

Started taking Paxil. Stopped taking Paxil and started taking Zoloft (which is better for PTSD anyway). Passed out from the Zoloft. Oh this is going to be fun.

Took Tuesday off to lay in the sun. My possible unicorn* came over and we made crepes, drank coffee and played in the sun. We talked about my breakdown and the litttle cuts on my legs (I forgot and wore short pants). He's understanding and sweet about it. I also got a chance to ask him why he had read Andrea Dworkin and Catherine MacKinnon. He told me that, being the theory geek he is, and also being a male living in a porn saturated society that he should read up on the topic. Which led him to MacKinnon who in turn led him to Dworkin. Reads Dworkin (ON HIS OWN-you know how most guys have because they dated someone who was into it) and is understanding of PTSD with Borderline tendancies? Yay. (or finally)


Had to go to my Physics lab. Still hate my lab TA. I was in the physics computer lab doing some homework and I had the latest post from Gendergeek entitled "Rape is a second class crime" and he thought it would be funny to say "Stop rape. Say yes." I somehow refrained from punching him (something about his controlling my grade). He then said "It's a joke" and I said "It's not funny." He then countered with "I'm not laughing." to which I replied "but you said it and that's bad enough." Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Oh good my lab TA not only fucking hits on me all the damn time but now is telling rape jokes. Gotta love it. I'm totally reporting that one though. (But don't worry, I do use my razor sharp wit to cut him down to size during the labs.)

Stopped by Take Back the Night (the Rape Relief sponsored one in Vacnouver is MUCH better and much more radical) and got to hear a poem about how being femme is revolutionary and how all the feminists are mad at the femmes b/c the femmes are "getting fucked." Yeah, hairy legged prudes hate you for getting laid. Oh wait, we don't hate you. I may see your idea that femme is revolutionary given the society we're in as lacking an insight into the overall cultural context, but I can tell you one thing: this up tight hairy legged prude is not angry because you're getting fucked and I'm not. We all are. It comes from being an oppressed person in a white patriarchal society. Oh and, I sometimes like to have sex too. *shocked expression*

Finished out the day with a migraine. Woohoo. SO glad I broke down and paid for Midrin. That shit is the best for migraines.


A 'joke' from my professor in physics today almost made me cry (I'm touchy lately). That's the second time it's happened, and well he all ready knows I work with Disability Student Resources for anxiety, etc. so I guess I should talk to him about it. Or I should have walked out of class. I don't know, but it sucks that one off hand comment that I would normally shrug off makes me want to cry. Ugh. Now I'm watching my geeky TV shoe Numb3rs (even fake math talk is sexy), and tommorrow I plan on sitting out in the sun and playing with my own numbers.

In other news on May 1st (MAY DAY WOO!!!! Worker's holiday!) I will be Blogging Against Disablism Day. As has been recently noted on this here blog I am on SSI Disability, which means I get money and medical insurance from the government because I am unable to hold down a steady job due to my severe PTSD/borderline tendancies/ensuing depression. Come join in whether you are disabled or not. (I know I missed Blogging against Heteronormativity day and I feel kind of bad about it, but the past few weeks have been riddled with anxiety and inability to put words together in coherent ways.)

ALso I never knew that naming rapists/abusers would have such an impact. I definitely do it more in real life everytime a rapist/abuser comes up in conversation I tell people that I hate them and why. It makes me awfully popular and others awfully uncomfortable.

Time to geek out and play with my kitty.

edited to add: Can anyone tell me how to use technocrati tags in non-computer speak?

*this stems from my belief that male feminists are unicorns. One will always be in training.

Wednesday, April 26, 2006


I just got busted by some late evening photo student (I'm at work) dancing my ass off to LCD Soundsystem's "Thrills." And I was totally busting out (no one's been here for an hour). It was amusing, I froze, we stared, and then I started laughing my ass off, and of course, kept dancing.

On a more serious note:
Also, because I think you should read it and I am just shocked that people still talk about one oppression trumping another read nubian's amazing post on the subject. Wow. What are you doing? Go read. NOW!

Monday, April 24, 2006

I like to start my posts with "hey all"

I miss you all and I'm sorry if I've been noticably absent from your comments lately. I had a horrible breakdown this weekend.

I start Paxil tommorrow. I just want to stop being so triggery all the time. I hope to be back soon. *smooches*

Friday, April 21, 2006

Hey all....

Since I'm going to be mostly out of touch for the next few days and I've developed a troll problem (sad little men with no lives) the comments are on moderation for the weekend. But it'll be back to normal soon.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Swollen Ball Syndrome redux

Very few of you were around back when I was talking about the poor men who suffer from Swollen Ball Syndrome.

Well I snipped this from Overheard in NY:

Woman: Buddy, your balls aren't as big as my ass, so shove over

--G train

hehehe. Poor babies, maybe they should seea doctor.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

So why am I on disability again? OH right, misogynist asshats....

Thank you le lyons for organising Blog to Raise Awareness About Sexual Violence Day.

I can't sleep next to my friends, well anyone actually unless it's right after sleeping with them.

I can't trust men. Even my good male friends who I know in a million years would never do anything to me b/c they actually respect me and think of me as an equal, as a human.

I have flashbacks and nightmares.

I got triggered and wind up in the hospital after my annual exam at Planned Parenthood.

I have to force myself to eat, to go to the bathroom, to get out of bed, to clean my apartment, to be social, to go grocery shopping (it's been 2 weeks. I have been eating very poorly), to bathe, to do almost anything most people do with ease.

I can't read my textbooks (I can't concentrate longer than 5 seconds).

I'm forcing myself to write this right now. I'd rather be curled up in bed pretending that the world didn't exist.

Recently (a couple months ago) I wrote about the asshole Luke who thought that me saying no was me actually saying "yes." I guess there is some other definition of the word "dissociate" out there too. Fucker. He's dead to me, though I sometimes wish he was dead (like when I see him) b/c I'm torn between telling him exactly why I ignored all his succesive phone calls and why I ignore his presence whenever he's around. But then I think it's not my fucking job, but I don't want him doing it to someone else. No does not mean stop for 10 seconds or fucking kiss somewhere else. IT MEANS NO.

Now I would have PTSD without ever having been sexually assaulted, but as most people know: the more traumas, the more a chance that you will develop severe PTSD. It seems so hard, it seems so endless. I can't write a new survivor story b/c I am just too sensitive to being triggered right now.

But I can see myself getting better. I know I am. I stopped myself from dissociating with Luke. I've modified my behaviour so much that I don't meet many men and I am rarely in situations where an assault is likely (most my assaults have happened in home, so if I don't let them come into my house I won't be assaulted, right?) I know about stranger rape, but as most women I know, I am more concerned about the men I do know. And I am sick of being told not to name them. I didn't make them assault me, they did it on their own.

I'm lifting this damn 'protect the assaulters" gag order. To quote my friend Kristin's band The Trucks "No I won't sit back and be quiet!"
Anarchists/"Radical Leftist" Men who assaulted me:
Enivronmental activists
-Brad Will-glasses, about 6', long brown hair (NYC)
-Ben from More Gardens, long blond curly hair, shorter then me, so less then 5'8 (5'6"?) (NYC)
Misc. "radicals"
-Adam Seehaver-brown hair, sometimes beard, about 5'10, last seen in Austin, TX (mostly CopWatch if I remember correctly)
-Allen (Seattle) last I saw neon dreads, short, lots of piercings in his face, works with Anti-Racist Action

Me sleeping does not mean 'molest me' and don't give me some bullshit about how you thought you were dreaming. These are only the recent ones, but these were people I considered my friends. I love cuddling with people, Allen (the last one) made sure that I will not cuddle with anyone without years of therapy. He pushed me over the edge. Here I am, 4 years later, on disability, with dramatic PTSD symptoms that prevent me from doing much more then working. Fuck all of them.

They stole my trust and a huge part of my life, but I'm going to win. I'm going to get better and I'm going to keep fighting and keep speaking out. They did not effectively silence me, and no one will unless they put me in the ground. I refuse to be ashamed for my mental disorder and for the fact that I was assaulted by more then those men. My story is not an anamoly. It's all too common, but if we all keep doing what we have and keep speaking out and keep ripping apart the lies of the patriarchy maybe one day one girl will get to grow up and not know our pain. And this is what keeps me going. Besides, assholes, the more you assault me or shame me, the more radical I become. Also the best way to break out of depression is doing something constructive with your anger. I call out your patriarchal woman hating bullshit and read other radical feminist blogs. That keeps me going, it gets me out of the house. I do it to spite you, I do it for me, I do it for all the women out there who may not be radical feminists and those that call me a prude. I do it for us all.

Because I am stronger having survived this, we all are. And if someone like me who can barely get out of the house on most days can write and reach scores of people on a daily basis with my feminism then you can't stop anyone. We'll win because we're right.

Monday, April 17, 2006

Did I forget the holidays again?

For Spotted Elephant

Sunday, April 16, 2006

A challenge for my readers.

So in physics when learning the Resistor colour code we're given a mnemonic device. Currently it still appears to be Bad Boys Ravish Only Young Girls But Violet Gives Willingly. There are obvious issues with this, and I only heard one professor ever say it which was only to me to point out how f*ed up it is.

The folks at Cosmic Variance have issued a challenge. It is the 21st century and we should have a better mnemonic device. Since I know many of my readers do not read the physics blogs, but would be offended by above mnemonic device I thought I'd give you a chance to participate. Post it here, post it there, let's change the super sexist (which also used to be the super racist Black Boys Rape Only Young Girls But Virgins Go Without) note how the racism was removed, but not the sexism. (I'm not the only one who noticed, either.) GRRRRR.

The Mnemonic device is to remember the followiung sequence: Black Brown Red Orange Yellow Green Blue Violet Grey White.

Friday, April 14, 2006

Don't call me a guy (things that piss me off #97)


There now that I got that out of the way. Calling a mixed group of people 'guys' is basically erasing the women in the group. Male pronouns, etc are the default for people, but are homo sapiens made up only of men? No. When a lone woman is walking down the street do you say 'hey, look at that guy?' Probably not because guy in the singular is considered male gendered, so why does adding an 's' to it suddenly make it gender neutral? Ooooh, surprise: it doesn't.

I know I am talking about the subject that makes men more angry then a lot of the other things that come out of my mouth. (Surprise, surprise). I guess I should be grateful or happy that they're basically calling me a guy. Because it's such a compliment to be called a guy, right? Um, no thanks. Being female I see nothing less or diminished about my gender, and I sure as hell find it insulting that I should not complain when guys call me a guy. (Just do a little experiment: try calling a mixed group or a group of all men 'ladies' or something equivalent. They find it insulting and get really uppity about it. How dare I call them something feminine! How insulting! So why can't I be insulted again? Oh yes, patriarchy.)

Because men have been in charge of creating the language male gendered terms have been defined as 'positive' or 'neutral' and all things feminine have (surprise, surprise) been defined as 'negative' or 'other.' So what? You say-it's only words. Only. Words. Think how silly that statement is. Words define our reality, they are the building blocks for most of our communication. They have meaning and when you use masculine language you essentially erase over half the population, and the patriarchy has made it easy to overlook women. Not that it sees us as fully human anyway. Observe what sociologists say:
The Sapir-Whorf hypothesis suggests that, as we learn a language, our sense of reality is shaped. Therefore our attitudes of what is masculine and feminine are taught to us mainly through our process of learning a language. Language then stays as part of culture long after its first speakers die, and its changes often lag far behind other social changes.
(From here.)

Still think that I'm grossly misled? HA! I laugh at you, there is so much study on this topic that you telling me that usiing anything masculine as gender neutral makes me laugh. Here's a nice handy dandy example:
If you write with nonsexist language, you write to represent with fairness the gender identified in many words. Gender-fair language minimizes unnecessary concern about gender in your subject matter, allowing both you and your reader to focus on what people do rather than on which sex they happen to be. For example, the practice of using he and man as generic terms poses a common problem. Rather than presenting a general picture of reality, he and man used generically can mislead your audience. Research by Wendy Martyna has shown that the average reader's tendency is to imagine a male when reading he or man, even if the rest of the passage is gender-neutral. Therefore, you cannot be sure that your reader will see the woman on the job if you refer to every technician as he, or that your reader will see the woman in the history of man. On the other hand, replacing every he with he or she attracts even more attention to gender and defeats your purpose. This predicament merits special attention in scientific and technical writing, where any ambiguity is unacceptable. (From here.)

Now change write to speak/write. Words are powerful, the masculine is not gender neutral, and if you call me a guy I may very well scream.

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Am I losing my edge?

I'm not calling people on bullshit like calling a group of people 'guys,' a lot of keeping my mouth shut around my fucked up misogynistic bike gang. I love doing crazy bike games and I want to make more mutant bikes, but I can't find people who are radical. I know a lot of being a radical feminist is walking the line between being in society and also being a radical feminist.

And right now I'm kind of down and lonely and I'm hanging out with assholes like my bike gang. Lately I'm just too tired. Maybe that's it. I'm tired and I'm alone (here anyway) and it's just as easy for me not to say anything as it is for them to write me off as 'that crazy bitch' although I must admit that I don't go out often. I hermit, because I can't deal with it-any of it.

Maybe this is just the PTSD talking, because I know I'll bounce back and be ranting and blaming away, but right now I just feel as though I've given up and that sucks.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Best Cartoon EVER

(click to make bigger)

I am in love with Cat and Girl (and you can see why from this post and the last one.)

It's that time of year again...

...for me to start obsessing about the Cubbies. Good lord do I love the Cubs. To me there is no other team on the planet, only them (well, them and the Cardinals who I hate and the White Sox who are inconsequential as they are in the AL. I mean the whole designated batter thing rubs me the wrong way. Our pitchers bat, yours should too dammit.)

Anyway, the purpose of this post is not to rant and rave about the Cubbies, but about Major League Baseball's gear. There's a giant gap between the things that are marketed to women vs. men. When looking for women's shirts (they do fit nicer then men's shirts as men's sizes start at a medium) I can get the Cubs shirt with flowers on it, or maybe a Cubs shirt in pink or baby blue. Now for those of you who are unsure what the problem is, the Cub's colours are red and blue. Not pink or baby blue (do you think anyone would find that 'manly' enough for a baseball team? HA!) But it's not just the Cubs, you can now buy hats and t-shirts for the Yankees in pink (colours: black and white), etc.

Women's hat:

Men's hat:

Now when you go to the online store and click on caps, only the latter comes up, as with the other types of apparel men's stuff *is* the default, but when you go to women's apparel you are assaulted with baby blues and pinks. *puke* Seriously if I wanna support my team I want to wear their colours, but just the idea of this is insulting. It's the MLB saying that women won't wear team stuff unless it's pink. Now I love the red and blue. I think most girls/women who grew/are growing up on the Northside of Chicago do. But that's not the point. Some people will read this and be all "I like pink" well, fine, but you don't get to choose your team colours. I would have gladly traded in the Green and "Gold" of my High School for any other colours, but guess what? I was stuck with those colours just as fans of sports teams are stuck with their colours. Like pastel pink, wear it even, but if you're supporting a tem you gotta wear their colours.

Back to the people who love the red and blue and may possibly have two X chromosomes: It's our team, it's a cultural thing not just a sports thing. I used to take my younger brother to games on the Red Line and get there early to watch batting practice. When I was home a few years ago I did it again (except he's older now and so am I so I got to *actually* drink at the game) we watched the Cubbies and the Astros from the bleachers, our summer home when we were growing up (and before tickets were $30-40 for bleacher seats. When we went I didn't see many kids in the bleachers. It's so sad. My dad can't even afford to go to games anymore, but that's a whole 'nother post.) We like the damn colours b/c they're the Cubbies colours. Pink is no one's colour.

I'm not the only girl I know who has a story like this. To grow up on the Northside of Chicago means you eat, sleep, and breathe Cubbies from Spring till September (sometimes fall, but really it's the Cubs we love them anyway.) So what's up MLB? Not to say that I haven't seen the offensive pink caps being worn, but seriously I can't buy a friggin' shirt in the correct colours without flowers on it. I mean the long sleeve hooded t-shirt sounded great until I saw it:

For the love of FSM, why? (I say acting as though I didn't know.) This shirt is on backorder so obviously it's popular enough, but seriously, why can't I like sports without flowers or pastel? What the hell were they thinking (again I say as if I didn't know) "Hmmm, we need to sell more women's stuff. Instead of making the men's stuff in sizes for women maybe we should make completely different stuff and add flowers! Yes! That's it! And then we'll give them no other option unless they want to watch too large men's clothing. Muahahahahahahahaha." I hate you MLB marketing team. I hate you so much. Plenty of women love sports teams and will wear their logo, etc without the pink. We just want an option that's not floral or pastel.

*NEWSFLASH* Women like things that aren't sterotypically "girly." But then again it seems as though they think I should be wondering more about how the players look then about their stats, because that's why women like sports, right? Fit players in tight pants? (Seriously I don't understand why women would be baseball fans then...there are more beerbellies in baseball then any other sport.)

Speaking of beerbellies-you know what makes me not want to wear my cubs stuff or watch the games? Bullshit "manly" posturing like what Carlos Zambrano pulled last year among other times. Hitting someone with a pitch and then yelling at him and acting all macho. I am seriously pissed that he's still on my team. The Cubbies didn't use to be like that, and he needs anger management classes. For the first time I *hate* one of the players on the Cubs, and it's for pulling the stereotypical "manly" bullshit. I know it's in other professional sports, but maybe if you want to keep a bigger audience you would rein that shit in somehow. I don't want to see fights, I want to see sports. Grrrr.

Anyway, since my Cubbies are on I am very distracted at this point, so I leave you with a cartoon from Cat and Girl (which is pretty damn good.)

(click on it to make it bigger)


(3 run homer!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!)

Friday, April 07, 2006

Things that piss me off #132

I'm back! (to ranting)

Do you notice that when talking about street harrassment or porn or things that dehumanise and exploit women with men we always have to relate these random women to them. Like "that's someone's mom or sister or daughter." Because we can't be human in our own right, we need to be human in relation to men. I can't say: "stop watching porn it's exploiting women" with the same impact that the statement has when I say: "stop watching porn b/c you could be exploiting your daughter/sister/girlfried/mother/etc". Why the hell should I have to say that? Why can't I be a treated as a person withoug having to resort to relating my status to other men? I know it's more effective that way, but really that's the problem.

I think most things come back to the points I made way back in my post about Compulsive masculinity that men categorise us. All feminists are aware of this. There's the sluts/whores/"loose women" who appear in porn or who like to have sex, there's the girlfriend (to this I will add relatives as well) who are pedestalised, and then there is the challenge. That would be me: the woman who is intellegent (and doesn't hide it), who is autonomous, and who the men can be friends with or even sleep with, but who in the end are women who challenge them too much and will never be in the girlfriend category. The last 2 groups are superficial respect, b/c if they respected us there wouldn't be these classifications or these tiny pedestals for us to stand on (or try to smash).

Every time someone does the "you shouldn't harrass women on the street b/c that woman is someone's (pick one of the terms above: sister/etc)" I die a little inside. It kills me because I know that that's the only way some men will listen: to respect other men's property. Can't disrespect the man by disrespecting his sister/gf/whatever. And if this method did *actually* work I think that I can guarentee we wouldn't be living in the pornographised culture that we currently have. Why? Because we wouldn't be exploiting other men's property, I mean, relatives or love interests. So it doesn't work, but it seems to work for a time until our culture and pro-porn 'feminists' tell these guys that yes we want to be exploited and that we choose it. (OK< so the pro-porners are saying that we find it liberating, but I guarentee that the guys are still thinking of the women in porn not as liberated, but as some [insert anti-woman slur like slut here].) Then they can safely move women into their correct categories and feel safe in the idea that their gf/mother/sister/daughter would never be one of those women, you know, the ones with "loose" morals.

Now sometimes this works. Sometimes guys wake up and go "OH MY GOD!!! I never thought of it that way!!" They need the relation b/c many of these things they will never experience themselves. But why? I don't need to experience racism personally to know that it's horribly cruel, fucked up and wrong. Doesn't matter what your skin colour is, we're all PEOPLE for chrissakes. People all deserve to be treated as such, and as equals. So why can't men do this? Why can't men see women and understand that we're people. I know, I know, social conditioning blah blah, but there are scores of people who have some sembleance of an understanding about oppression and basic human rights (decency) what's so fucking hard about extending that to women? (And I AM talking about the left here you fuckers.)

And just to talk about my favourite topic for a second: if burlesque has nothing to do with men's sexuality and all about the women on stage expressing themselves how many men would go and watch their sisters? Seriously, none, b/c burlesque is not about art or performing, it's about performing sexually for men. FOR MEN. Need that again? Burlesque is about PERFORMING FOR MEN. Ok, now that we got that cleared up. I have no problems with getting up and performing my sexuality, but it's so far outside the norm that it's not assumed to be sexual. My relatives have seen it. Why? I'm a clown. I love making an ass out of myself. That is the cornerstone of my sexuality. Me being me and having fun. (And when I say me being me, I mean the me who pushed through all those ideas that I was raised with about being sexy, etc. Me being who it took me years and missteps to find. And I must say, at least with regards to my sexuality I feel very confident that it is something I came to on my terms without (or because of) societies influences.) My entire sexuality is about me being silly. I can do it anywhere I want, but it's not me performing for others: it's me performing for me and so I am exempt from the overt sexual exploitation (for the most part...people really like clowns) that comes with performances like burlesque or 'sexy' fire dancing or what have you. (See how slyly I worked that in there? huh, huh?)

Actually the next time there's a burlesque show that I happen to catch I think that letting everyone know that these women are indeed someone's sister/gf/mother/daughter /etc. I wonder how they'll take it. Do you think they'll like to hear that?

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Some days you just need to get your geek on

Because you're too overwhelmed by patriarchal vileness to do anything else.

Yo! So I hope you all have seen this beauty, the kiwa hirsuta discovered in the Pacific Ocean. The furry crustacean was found "in waters 2,300m (7,540ft) deep at a site 1,500km (900 miles) south of Easter Island, an expert has claimed." I think it's really cool. But you're all thinking to yourselves, that's old news, why are you posting about it now? Because now, dear readers, you can make your own! That's right, and I know that I will be downloading the pattern and making my very own kiwa hirsuta. It's so cute!!!

But that's not all gentle readers, this edition of Lost Clown shows us how geeky she really is also answers the question: "Why do you want
to be an astrophysicist", or more accurately: "why do you want to get into space so damn bad?" (Not that I think humans per se, should be in space, but I still want to go.) Here you go, the dirty little secret reason I want to be an astrophysicist. It has nothing to do with an obsession with the stars or the fact that I love physics, OR the fact that I want to turn physics into a "girly" science. No it's because I'm a Klown (synonym for lush) and they have found a giant cloud of alcohol in space. Not so much the kind you drink, but we can work on that. (And I plan to.)

This one speaks for itself "Men are very bad for women really," he said. But women are good for men!.
Probably not what you think, but check it out anyway. (hat tip for alcohol and the last 2 links: Inky Circus.)

I got something for ya:
Isn't it pretty? Dead stars and new planets?

NASA's Spitzer Space Telescope has uncovered new evidence that planets might rise up out of a dead star's ashes.

The infrared telescope surveyed the scene around a pulsar, the remnant of an exploded star, and found a surrounding disk made up of debris shot out during the star's death throes. The dusty rubble in this disk might ultimately stick together to form planets.

This is the first time scientists have detected planet-building materials around a star that died in a fiery blast.

Cool, no?

Ok, so I took my ecological footprint test at Care2 and got these results:

FOOD 2.5




Update: When I addd all the people who live in the house (appx. 6) my score goes down to 2 planets. It's definitely the living alone thing.

Do I need to cut back or what. I thought I was doing so well (comparatively to other residents of this country I guess I am. My neighbours are so much worse.) Though I notice that it's my shelter that's eating up. And that's why i spend most my time in the woods. (Hat tip: The Nut House.)

OK, that's all for now, but I do hope to geek out more often as astrophysics is my chosen "career" path and I am in love with it. (among other random science geekiness. I just understand what the physicists are talking about more then the other scientists. I barely passed bio and chem classes. Thinking about them still makes me cringe.)

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Good g_d I hate Burlesque. HATE!!!

I went to Crtical Mass on Friday (woo taking over the street with bikes!!) and there was a post-Mass party with booze, dancing, and oh yes, burlesque. Can't do anything without burlesque these days now can we? (Of course not.)

So I was there, hoping that it wouldn't be so bad (really I knew, but who knows what was going through my mind) and so I was inside the bar when this was going on. What happens? The guy comes out dressed as a cowboy and he wanders around stage blah blah. Then a woman comes out dressed as a horrible stereotype of a First Nations woman (complete with headress). He proceeded to grab her and she fought him off. Then she shot "arrows" at him while he shot "bullets" at her, which ultimately led to her shooting him in the shoulder. She then proceeded to care for him, which apparently meant a strip tease and then removing his clothes. Yeah b/c after I fight someone off I always want to strip naked for them.

Besides being spitting angry from the whole "burlesque" thing, which btw was a bunch of conventionally "pretty" body types, I could not get over how racist this was. And it was only me. No one else was sitting there going 'how fucked up!' But then again, the audience was white as white can be. (The woman playing the First Nations woman was Asian.) So how is burlesque transcendent again? I forgot.


Edited to add: It's very telling that male stripping is seen as comical and female stripping is objectifying. Surely that is not because of power imbalances having to do with patriarchy that make burlesque about the male gaze now is it?

Sunday, April 02, 2006

April 18th Blog to Raise Awareness about Sexual Violence Day

Hey All, let's make this a really good rescource out there for women (and men) who have suffered from sexual violence. This is a call out for stories, poems, etc that either talk about our experiences (anonymous publishing will be ok, you can email Le Lyons and she will anonymously publish you for this day if you prefer that).

If you are interested in participating, please leave a comment below
linking to your site. Or email le_lyons (at) yahoo (dot) com at anytime if you don't have a
blog or would like to post your story anonymously on my "Survivors'
" page. Please also consider linking to this from your own blog to spread the word. Thank you.

So please check out the information here and help us raise awareness and raise our voices against this epidemic that too many of us have had to deal with.