A place to vent my frustrations about living in a effed up white male dominated, ableist, capitalistic society. And if you're mean, misogynistic, or in any other way effed up I will delete you. And yes, it is at my discretion. Whine about it elsewhere.
Independence re-declared on July 16, 2008.
(and anonymous posting is rude)
Monday, April 24, 2006
I like to start my posts with "hey all"
I miss you all and I'm sorry if I've been noticably absent from your comments lately. I had a horrible breakdown this weekend.
I start Paxil tommorrow. I just want to stop being so triggery all the time. I hope to be back soon. *smooches*
Thanks all, I'm working on it. I've been considering meds for a good while now, even though I was anti-med for a long ass time.
I have very supprotive fRIENDS (you all are included) and a supportive person that I've been seeing (who read Andrea Dworkin ON HIS OWN and who came by today and made crepes and coffee with me and hung out in the sunshine and discussed my breakdown (which he witnessed part of), although he did notice the cuts on my leg (very superficial and also the reason I am so eager to go on meds right now-no more cutting) so things look good-I've had nothing but support, thank you all-it means so much.)
I don't know anything about your situation or your doctor, and I am neither one of those things nor a licensed professional. I also don't know how informed you are about the medications you're taking or considering.
Having said that, I've seen many times people being diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, get put on an SSRI like Paxil or Zoloft, and end up with hallucinations and other psychosis symptoms because they were actually bipolar and mis-diagnosed. And for whatever reason, putting someone with bipolar disorder on anti-depressants seems to run a significant chance of screwing everything up.
I only mention it because the mental health field is, at the moment, pretty much a patchwork of trial-and-error, and know at least a couple women who came out of that system worse off than they went into it.
In spite of that, there is help to be had there, you just have to keep yourself informed. And not be afraid to speak up, in spite of the fact that a white coat and/or a red leather barcalounger makes a person seem pretty darned credible and imposing.
So yeah, you've probably done ten times more research on Paxil, etc, than I've ever done, and I'm just being male-privlegey and patronising in assuming you haven't... I don't mean to be, honest. I just get concerned about these things.
Dubhe-I have done plenty of research into SSRIs. Actually I hate them and have been resisting them for years, but at this point I want to try something. I've actually stopped the Paxil b/c we're trying to get Medicaid to pay for Zoloft, which is better for PTSD sufferers.
And I am completely 100% not bipolar (I was diagnosed as bipolar once, but I didn't believe it then and I have had many other psychiatrists who have known me a lot better than that whacko tall me I am definitely not bipolar. Just severe PTSD, which when I get triggered can give me major depression or major anxiety.
But thanks for your concern, I'm really concerned as well. (duh)
Take care of yourself, clown. Meds can do wonders if you've got a certain kind of chemistry -- I can attest. Changed my life. I hope the Paxil works out for you.
Love and hugs, LC. I've been on Paxil, I hope it helps you. If you want to talk or rant you can always email me (laurelinintherain@yahoo.co.uk).
ReplyDeleteI miss you sweetie! xxx
Sorry to hear that.
ReplyDeleteTake care of yourself and I hope you will be back soon. Troll problems too? I know what that's like.
Hey, nice to hear from you. Hope you're ok. xx
ReplyDeleteI hope the Paxil helps. You're doing a great job with the blog.
ReplyDeleteTP x
*hug and smooches* Take care of you first.
ReplyDeleteAs long as you are feeling better, that's all we care about.
ReplyDeleteI Love You!
Hugs, LC. Hope you're feeling better soon.
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry to hear that Burrow. I hope the Paxil kicks in soon and it helps.
ReplyDeleteThanks all, I'm working on it. I've been considering meds for a good while now, even though I was anti-med for a long ass time.
ReplyDeleteI have very supprotive fRIENDS (you all are included) and a supportive person that I've been seeing (who read Andrea Dworkin ON HIS OWN and who came by today and made crepes and coffee with me and hung out in the sunshine and discussed my breakdown (which he witnessed part of), although he did notice the cuts on my leg (very superficial and also the reason I am so eager to go on meds right now-no more cutting) so things look good-I've had nothing but support, thank you all-it means so much.)
Big hugs for you my dear, and hoorah for Dworkin reading boy! xxxx
ReplyDeleteHugs, LC. Take it from me - the right drugs can be a very good thing. Hope that open minded guy turns out to be a great thing for you.
ReplyDeleteGood luck. I hope the Paxil turns out to be the right med for you, and I hope things pick up soon.
ReplyDeleteTry to take care of yourself. :)
I don't know anything about your situation or your doctor, and I am neither one of those things nor a licensed professional. I also don't know how informed you are about the medications you're taking or considering.
ReplyDeleteHaving said that, I've seen many times people being diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, get put on an SSRI like Paxil or Zoloft, and end up with hallucinations and other psychosis symptoms because they were actually bipolar and mis-diagnosed. And for whatever reason, putting someone with bipolar disorder on anti-depressants seems to run a significant chance of screwing everything up.
I only mention it because the mental health field is, at the moment, pretty much a patchwork of trial-and-error, and know at least a couple women who came out of that system worse off than they went into it.
In spite of that, there is help to be had there, you just have to keep yourself informed. And not be afraid to speak up, in spite of the fact that a white coat and/or a red leather barcalounger makes a person seem pretty darned credible and imposing.
So yeah, you've probably done ten times more research on Paxil, etc, than I've ever done, and I'm just being male-privlegey and patronising in assuming you haven't... I don't mean to be, honest. I just get concerned about these things.
Sorry.
Dubhe-I have done plenty of research into SSRIs. Actually I hate them and have been resisting them for years, but at this point I want to try something. I've actually stopped the Paxil b/c we're trying to get Medicaid to pay for Zoloft, which is better for PTSD sufferers.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am completely 100% not bipolar (I was diagnosed as bipolar once, but I didn't believe it then and I have had many other psychiatrists who have known me a lot better than that whacko tall me I am definitely not bipolar. Just severe PTSD, which when I get triggered can give me major depression or major anxiety.
But thanks for your concern, I'm really concerned as well. (duh)
Hey . I hope you get to feeling better, soon.
ReplyDeleteIf ze Paxil doesn't help, or makes you too groggy, Lexapro might be worth a spin.
xx Tx
Take care of yourself, clown. Meds can do wonders if you've got a certain kind of chemistry -- I can attest. Changed my life. I hope the Paxil works out for you.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Violet
I hope it all gets better soon.
ReplyDelete